Not If You Break Up with Me First: A Reflection on Friendship, Crushes, and Middle School Drama
When I first stumbled upon Not If You Break Up with Me First by Julie Flett, the title alone sparked a little nostalgic tug in my heart. Who hasn’t navigated those awkward waters of middle school friendships that dabbled in the uncharted territories of crushes? As a book blogger with an affinity for stories that capture the bittersweet nature of youth, I felt an instant connection with this premise. However, while the story had its shining moments, it ultimately left me grappling with mixed feelings.
At its core, this middle grade romance is about Andrew and Eve—two childhood best friends preparing to navigate the murky waters of adolescence together. After a summer apart, they decide that maybe it’s time to take their relationship beyond platonic boundaries. The struggle depicted here—of wanting to be more than friends yet fearing the loss of that cherished bond—is both real and relatable, reminding me sharply of my own teenage trials. The dialogue and inner thoughts exchanged between the characters often took me back to my own memories, a poignant blend of joy and heartache.
Flett has an uncanny ability to capture those fleeting moments of youthful epiphany. One passage, in particular, resonated deeply with me: "Isn’t there any way for the two stars not to destroy each other?" This metaphor for Andrew and Eve’s relationship reflects the gravity of their friendship and the pull of mutual attraction—an artful reminder that friendship can sometimes become complicated. It’s a cosmic dance, indeed.
However, not all of my reading experience was uplifting. While the ending encapsulated that aching honesty beautifully, the journey to get there felt riddled with unnecessary detours. My main frustration lay in how prolonging their awkward attempts to separate as a couple devolved into childish antics that made it challenging to stay engaged. Their reluctance and failure to communicate openly about their feelings, despite their long-standing friendship, came off as a bit forced and somewhat unrealistic.
One moment that sparked my annoyance was when Andrew declares he needs his friends’ help to end things with Eve—why not just talk it out? This refusal to be straightforward felt far too exaggerated for a friendship that was built on years of trust. I couldn’t help but wish for some more grounded moments in their relationship.
That said, the heartfelt moments between the two, particularly the ending, truly saved the day for me. The bittersweet realization that some things evolve rather than unravel, encapsulated in Eve’s thought, “Change isn’t so bad after all,” left a warm comfort in my heart amidst my criticisms.
Not If You Break Up with Me First may not fully satisfy in its execution, but I believe it will resonate with young readers grappling with crushes, friendship stages, and peer pressures. Julie Flett has crafted a story that highlights the beauty and pain of growing up, making it an emotionally evocative read for those who remember their own turbulent middle school days. If you enjoy narratives rich with authenticity and heartfelt moments, this book is worth picking up, if only for that tender ending.
Ultimately, while I walked away with a 2.75-star rating—appreciating the sentiments conveyed yet disappointed by some of the execution—the aching memories it stirred remind me of why I keep coming back to stories like this: they reflect our pasts, our hopes, and the sometimes messy reality of growing up. 💖
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